U.S. Supreme Court
Goldilocks Avoids Criminal Sanction When Sotomayor Judges Dispute on Sesame Street
By Debra Cassens Weiss
Feb 8, 2012, 05:58 pm CST
Justice Sonia Sotomayor took on more of an arbitrator role when she appeared on Sesame Street and heard the case of Goldilocks v. Baby Bear.
Sotomayor began by explaining her role for young viewers. “A Supreme Court justice is a judge who solves arguments by giving his or her opinion,” she said.
The justice was able to demonstrate when Baby Bear complained that Goldilocks came into his house uninvited, sat on his chair and broke it. Goldilocks responded that she was tired and she didn’t intend to break the chair. When prompted by Sotomayor, she offered to use some glue to help fix it.
The BrandonKraft satire feigned outrage that Sotomayor was apparently soft on crime. “How do we expect the eighth highest-ranking judge in the United States to rule on this case?” the blog asked. “Would she use this as an opportunity to turn Goldilocks’ life around as it appears this could be a beginning of a petty crime career that could lead to much worse?
“No. Not at all. The judge ruled the only retribution required of Goldilocks would be to assist in fixing the chair. With glue! The chair was split in half! There is no way to repair that type of damage to bring the chair to its original condition.”