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Law Firms Anticipate Turkey Day, Hand Out Free Birds

Nov 21, 2012, 05:01 pm CDT

Comments

The helicopter is on its way….

By Arthur Carlson on 2012 11 21, 5:24 pm CDT

Oh the humanity!

By Les Nessman on 2012 11 22, 12:19 am CDT

As God as my witness I thought turkeys could fly!

By Mr. Carlson on 2012 11 22, 4:12 pm CDT

For those not of a certain age, the above refers to an episode of WKRP in Cincinnati. In said episode, Arthur “Big Guy” Carlson and Les “Fish Eye in the Sky” Nessman decide to give out free live turkeys to the citizens of Cincinnati by releasing them from a helicopter. However, as you can guess, the release did not go as anticipated.

By faddking on 2012 11 23, 3:20 pm CDT

I forgot to mention that Herb “He of the Many Leisure Suits” Tarlick was also part of the plan.

By faddking on 2012 11 24, 10:40 am CDT

To conduct such an event properly, they would need to engage Lynyrd Skynyrd to perform the background music.

By B. McLeod on 2012 11 24, 3:24 pm CDT

I was always confused by that episode because turkeys can fly - I have seen them.  And even domesticated turkeys who may be heavier and not have the strength or practice flying, can sort-of-fly and so at least not plummet to the ground like bombs, smashing car windshields.

By Dr Phun on 2012 11 27, 12:41 pm CDT

Wild turkeys can indeed fly but domestic turkeys bred for Thanksgiving meals fly no better than a penguin and are a heckuva lot less aerodynamic.

By faddking on 2012 11 27, 12:44 pm CDT

That’s the point.  Domestic turkeys may not be able to fly in the sense that they can gain altitude, but can they flap their wings enough to impede their descent so they don’t plummet like a bowling ball.  i.e. Are they so un-areodynamic that they descend slowly ?  (If they were aerodynamic, they would descend more quickly due to the lack of air resistance) 

I always wondered why, if Carleson thought turkeys could fly, he thought that the turkeys wouldn’t fly away, or just to the roof of the shopping center?  And if someone did receive a live turkey, would they know how to butcher and pluck it?

By Dr Phun on 2012 11 28, 12:39 pm CDT

@9 but can they flap their wings enough to impede their descent so they don’t plummet like a bowling ball.

Domestic turkeys no more impede their descent by flappings their wings than you can by flapping your arms.

“And if someone did receive a live turkey, would they know how to butcher and pluck it?”

Dude, it was a fah king 70s TV show for Christ’s sake!

By faddking on 2012 11 29, 1:08 am CDT

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