Women in the Law
Are Midcareer Female Attorneys in Crisis?
Posted Dec 22, 2008 4:48 PM CST
By Rachel M. Zahorsky
Corporate midcareer women are in big trouble, and that includes female attorneys, says a career and life coach who specializes in women's empowerment issues.
“After devoting years to building successful careers, most of them feel that their professional lives and identities no longer work,” says Kathy Caprino, author of the recently published book “Breakdown, Breakthrough: The Professional Woman’s Guide to Claiming a Life of Passion, Power and Purpose."
In her book, Caprino identifies 12 crises that corporate midcareer women face, including work-life balance failures, bad or intolerable treatment at work, and a fearfulness to speak up without being rejected or punished. These issues "absolutely apply" to women in the legal profession as well, Caprino says.
Careful not to blame their male counterparts, Caprino says many female professionals are dominated at work by generally white-male competitive career models that emphasize linear career paths and the assumption that top-performing women are motivated most by money and power.
Nicole Nehama Auerbach, who founded a Chicago-based organization called the Coalition of Women's Initiatives in Law Firms, agrees with Caprino and says her research is especially relevant in the legal industry.
Women often bring intangibles to the firm such as nurturing business and a knack for making client teams work, Auerbach says. And these qualities are difficult to quantify compared to billing hours in a profit-driven world.
“I think a lot of the issues she seizes upon would never be issues men would point to as a reason for not succeeding,” Auerbach says. “Traditionally, women are not as vocal about getting what they want; women were previously conditioned not to complain. That’s very different from the way a lot of men were raised.”
According to Caprino, female attorneys are also dis-empowered in ways that men are not, such as limited access to same-gender role models and the fact that women are still responsible for 75 percent of domestic responsibilities, even if they have full-time careers.
A dearth of female equity partners, and thereby fewer high-level female mentors, is a reality separating the women from the men in law firms.
"The big question is 'why are they not staying?'" asks Auerbach, who left Katten Muchin Rosenman to co-found Valorem Law Group in April 2008 after 14 years in practice. "Statistically there should be plenty of women at every level,” Auerbach points out, noting that women comprise 50 percent or more of many first-year associate classes, “but they are dropping out."
Additionally, while embracing a ‘good enough’ attitude is sound advice for female lawyers struggling to balance work and private life, Auerbach says the reality is often more difficult for attorneys who want to give the best to every client.
Women raising families often find that you cannot do every single thing in the most perfect way always, Auerbach says. However, “I would hate to tell a client, I’ve given you good enough."
- How B of A’s GC Got Fired: Leave Now, and Leave Your BlackBerry Behind
- Schools Ranked by 'Super Lawyers' Produced
- Law Firm Price Wars Break Out as Some Try ‘Loss Leader’ Bids for Work
- Five Questions for Law Firms Abandoning Lockstep Compensation
- Judge Jails 2 Attorneys for Contempt in 4 Days
- Reed Smith Will Ask Nonequity Partners to Pony Up Possibly 15% of Pay
- Court Deputy Ordered to Apologize or Face Jail After Taking Lawyer's Paperwork
- Skadden Jumps on the Bonus Bandwagon
- ABA Executive Director Resigns
- Nasty Attitude to Co-Worker, Naughty Word in E-Mail Cost 2 Their Jobs
Should Supreme Court Justices Be Able to Review News Accounts Before Publication?
Comments
A Arbin
Dec 23, 2008 5:52 AM CST
Of course they are, but who cares? We’re all in crisis, and the last thing we need these days is to be stylish, worrying about some women who divide their time between practicing law and playing house. This is not the time to worry about these ditherers.
The country is going down the tubes economically, and we have to worry about the full timers who are working very hard to hold it all together.
When times get better, we can start being stylish again, but for now, tell these ditherers that they shoud just go home and have hubby take care of things for them.
Flag this comment
Emmie
Dec 23, 2008 6:10 AM CST
Well, I am four years out of law school, and I have had a child. I wish that someone would have told me back then not to even bother with a big law firm job if you are thinking of getting married and having kids. It just doesn’t work. The only women who I have seen are successful in big Law are either single into their 30s or their husbands do not work/work part time. With that said, I sincerely hope that my colleagues in house or in government are having a much better time of it.
Flag this comment
Associate Zero
Dec 23, 2008 6:28 AM CST
“Stylish?” What the heck does this have to do with being “stylish?” Did I miss the reference to shoes and accessories in the article?
Flag this comment
Em
Dec 23, 2008 6:58 AM CST
I work for the federal government agency as an attorney. There are a lot of women here with families working in high positions. This agency has flexible scheduling and is ready to reward women promotionally. If you hate your big firm job, try looking around on usajobs.
Flag this comment
DR
Dec 23, 2008 7:00 AM CST
Stylish? Maybe you mean politically correct? I really believe that the reason most of us are employed and can bill the hours is because we spend incredible amounts of time trying to figure out what other lawyers are trying to argue.
I have a young child and it is tough to balance good parenting (or “playing house”) with a busy legal career. I wouldn’t change anything in the world, though, because I love being a parent and I find the practice of law to be challenging
on most levels. It helps to have a supportive spouse or partner or some other support system, because eventually (if you try to do it all yourself) most people can bottom out from exhaustion (sometimes I’ve been on the edge myself and if it wasn’t for such a strong support system around me, I’d probably throw in the towel). Fortunately, I’m not surrounded by “ditherers” or those embittered “full-time people trying to hold it together”, so a lot can be accomplished. :)
Flag this comment
silencedogood
Dec 23, 2008 7:15 AM CST
” women were previously conditioned not to complain”
Clearly, the author has not met my ex-wife…
Flag this comment
DLS
Dec 23, 2008 7:19 AM CST
Wow, there’s a surprise. “I don’t like the game so I think they should change the rules to make it easier for me to compete”. If you want a personal life then take a job that fits that choice. Stop expecting to make a ton of money, have a great career and a perfect home life. Life is about compromises and you can’t have it all. So stop complaining that your career isn’t giving you everything you wanted and demanding that the world change to suit you!
Flag this comment
DH
Dec 23, 2008 7:33 AM CST
Wow, can I say white male alert? “stylish”, “stop complaining” and choose another job? We really haven’t come that far in this field. I suppose if we valued women in the field and at home we would change the work place, but clearly we do not value women in both places. Having to choose one or the other is hard and we should not have to choose. Yes, I am a black woman trying to make it in the legal world and do everything at home. It is a part of our culture for women to raise the children and take care of the home, but these days we need to work as well to support the family with or without husbands. Why should we be steered only to low level jobs where “we don’t have to make that choice”? We are not in the past where women are secretaries or waitresses although maybe men would prefer that.
Flag this comment
b
Dec 23, 2008 7:43 AM CST
The White Male Conspiracy continues…
Flag this comment
lifeofideas
Dec 23, 2008 7:51 AM CST
The federal government model of employment and giving mothers some flexibility (and to fathers, too) is where law firms should be, too. Law firms have evolved into a pyramid scheme based on the attempt of the middle class strivers trying to rise in the world, and the wealthy exploiting them. We need some kind of national policy change. I vote for bringing back the progressive income tax so the top-dogs at least pay more into the system that benefits them so much.
Flag this comment
Unbelievable
Dec 23, 2008 7:56 AM CST
I’m a female equity partner in a “Biglaw” firm with a young child. Yes it’s hard to both address dometic issues and be a good attorney. But, it’s not impossible and it is actually quite doable. My theory has always been and remains that if men have time to go to lunch and golf with friends and have their other extra curricular activities (i.e., sports, girlfriends on the side), there’s no reason a woman can’t have a demanding (but satisfying) personal and work life. It seems to me that the problem women have isn’t insufficient dedication or contributions in the workplace, but, rather, insufficient recognition for their contributions and support from the male dominated firm management and rainmakers who view them through a different lense than their male peers. Male senior attorneys naturally better identify with and thus, consciously or not, provide more support to the junior male attorneys. This is what needs to change through conscious efforts on their part to avoid what is pure discrimination on a de facto basis. My theory on why this is more of an issue for mid-career women is that at this point they become peers rather than subordinates of the more powerful senior men whose support they need to continue succeeding - but those men are less comfortable with them in that role on a personal level than they are with the mid-career men. For those men who think their female collegues aren’t pulling their weight, why don’t you have the same criticism of your male partners who aren’t in the top 10% of producers at your firm? Why do you just single out the women who aren’t in that category? The bottom line is that men need to support their less productive female peers to the same extent that they support their less productive male peers. This double standard has got to change. Women have families to support too. The emperor has no clothes!
Flag this comment
Not A Arbin
Dec 23, 2008 8:06 AM CST
A Arbin, I would much rather have a brilliant part time female attorney/colleague at my firm who is also an active parent (demonstrating she can and will get things done, and done well), then a full time myopic employee with the ignorance to label her a ‘ditherer’ and to call the concern ‘stylish.’ quality of work, not just quantity. Failure of any corporate model to embrace that concept is quite a loss. (And by the way, I stifled my initial ‘verb & pronoun’ reaction to your comment. but barely).
Flag this comment
AKC
Dec 23, 2008 8:15 AM CST
I have met a lot more male ditherers in my private and corporate career than female. There’s some in every setting, but the hardest workers (and least frequent whiners) I seen are the women who “do it all.”
Flag this comment
CXD
Dec 23, 2008 8:27 AM CST
If as women you’re unable to advance to where you want to be careerwise because you need to spend more, or some, time with the kids, blame the father, not the firm!
Flag this comment
AA
Dec 23, 2008 8:40 AM CST
I too have encountered more male ditherers in my private firm practice. More devastating for private law firms however, are the male introverts who are “career committed” yet lack any ability to relate to clients and build meaningful (and profitable) relationships. Most of the men I’ve heard complaining about female associates have far more severe personality defects than a full personal life. Oh, and this was first pointed out to me, a female associate, by my very wise and extremely successful rainmaker male mentor.
Flag this comment
BB
Dec 23, 2008 8:56 AM CST
Not to be obvious, but the last part of the article says “Women raising families often find that you cannot do every single thing in the most perfect way always” ...None of us can be perfect: Men without families, women without families. I’m 2 years out of law school with a husband, no kids. I know I’m not perfect, and that my clients get my best, but not pefection…because, again, I can’t be perfect. If the standard for anyone (male, female, family, not family) is perfection then none of us can meet it, especially those with additional demands on their time (whatever those may be).
Flag this comment
Scottie
Dec 23, 2008 9:01 AM CST
I am a female attorney who is married with three young children. This article is wretched. I have accepted my career limitations and feel that the trade off of being a mother is well worth it. Why do women feel like they have to justify their existence. So what if we “could” do it as well as men without the dreadful burdens of a family—a blessing I’ll take any day of the week. Grow up ladies. When women stop complaining about not being able to have it all and start forging ahead in whatever direction they have chosen, their treatment will change. Haven’t we learned that you earn respect and that you don’t get it by whining. Why should a man logging much more time and energy at the office be vilified or expected to lower his expectations to accomodate less dedicated colleagues. And, don’t blame the husband/father. That’s just mis-diagnosing the problem.
Flag this comment
Unbelievable
Dec 23, 2008 9:08 AM CST
Scottie - I respectfully disagree with your thought that women who complain about the status quo should “grow up”. I think you are misdiagnosing the problem because you don’t have all of the facts. The reality is that men are regularly getting more credit than women for the same or lesser contribution to a law firm. Just because you have not chosen to pursue equal credit for equal work doesn’t mean that other’s shouldn’t do so. Morevoer, for those who want to have the same opportunity for a career as a man with three children at home, you are mistaken that the father isn’t to blame - if a father wants 3 children and is a supportive partner to his wife, he is responsible for doing his fair share of the work at home so his wife can have the same workplace opportunities as him. Perhaps your husband is more career oriented than you and is sucessfull enough that you don’t need to pursue the most compensation possible in the workplace -but don’t sell the rest of your gender out who are not in the same position as are you.
Flag this comment
Annie Q
Dec 23, 2008 9:14 AM CST
The central problem of being alive is to come to an understanding of what makes life worthwhile, and the search for the answer never ends. Calling it a “midlife crisis” or attributing it to some dimly defined aspect of feminine nature is silly and divisive. Men don’t have the answer to the fundamental question anymore than women, but they don’t trivialize the question by convincing themselves that a job or a spouse or any external thing will be the answer. Have fun in your job, enjoy what you know about yourself, and join humanity in the struggle to figure out the rest! (or the portion of humanity that has the luxury of trying to figure it out, as opposed to the vast majority of people who are just trying to keep their kids alive another day).
Flag this comment
BINGO
Dec 23, 2008 9:15 AM CST
“Male senior attorneys naturally better identify with and thus, consciously or not, provide more support to the junior male attorneys. This is what needs to change through conscious efforts on their part to avoid what is pure discrimination on a de facto basis. My theory on why this is more of an issue for mid-career women is that at this point they become peers rather than subordinates of the more powerful senior men whose support they need to continue succeeding - but those men are less comfortable with them in that role on a personal level than they are with the mid-career men.”
BINGO—no more needs to be said here. Mid-career women don’t get the support from the senior career men (you need their support in order to advance in most organizations—firm and corporate) because the senior career men begin to see the women as “threats” or not as peers, even though the senior career men don’t see the mid-career men the same way.
Bottom line: the senior career men, who often have power in many private (firm and corporate) organizations see a reflection of themselves (maybe 10 or 20 years earlier) when they see the mid-career men. But the senior career men, if they are married, probably do not have wives that work outside the home, or if the wives do work, I would be that the majority of them are not professional/corporate career women. As a result, these senior career men can’t relate to the mid-career women at all; they think that these women should be at home raising their kids. If any of these senior career men have daughters, God have mercy on them…often these types of men don’t understand their behavior until their daughters have been treated this way.
I think this problem will change once the older generation dies out. There will always be the “boys club,” and chauvinism, but I don’t think that women will be as frozen out as they used to be.
Flag this comment
Associate Twelve
Dec 23, 2008 9:24 AM CST
Frankly, ALL midcareer attorneys should be in crisis, because by that point they should have all woken up to what we’re in for - for the rest of our lives. And the ones who never wanted to be lawyers at all have woken up to the fact that they are stuck - for the rest of their lives - just because mommie and daddy couldn’t love them until they had MD or JD on a diploma some day.
The practice is broken, thank goodness someone is realizing it.
Flag this comment
B. McLeod
Dec 23, 2008 9:27 AM CST
I remember “Mr. Ditherer” from the “Dagwood” strip. He seemed like the type that would actually be quite at home in a big firm, likely as Managing Partner.
Flag this comment
Scottie
Dec 23, 2008 9:32 AM CST
Unbelievable— What makes you think I am not pursuing equal credit for equal work and the most comp possible in the workplace? Or that my husband is so successful?? And, I think I do have all of the facts. Which ones would you suggest I am missing? If anyone is “having it all”, it would be me. However, if you think that shoving a concept down men’s throats so that they will think differently and treat female colleagues in a particular manner, I sincerely believe you are wasting your time. I’ll stand by what I said previously—women will get respect over time by performing well and complaining about inequality less. This doesn’t mean inequality doe not exist. I just happened to see a different approach to it. Look, if you want to make the feminazi argument, then make it. In my opinion, women are trying to restructure homelife after the fact to accomodate workplace goals. Why do we want to turn men into a bunch of house husbands so that we can feel empowered? I suppose I have to admit that I believe the feminization of men in America is a bad thing. And, it seems to be what working women want.
Flag this comment
Jamie N
Dec 23, 2008 9:33 AM CST
This article and the comments ignore the fact that many women make an informed CHOICE to leave the legal profession, or at least cut back, in order to spend more time raising families. It’s not necessarily that they couldn’t “have the best of both worlds” or didn’t have support from their firms or spouses, it’s just that they don’t WANT to. I am working full time right now and enjoying it, but I can see my priorities switching someday. And that will be my decision and I will be fine with it. Anyone who truly wants to take the career path can. So I don’t see a crisis.
Flag this comment
Shannon
Dec 23, 2008 9:50 AM CST
So Scottei, you believe that women should have the babies, go to work, trot on home so they can prepare dinner and clean the house, all so that there husband won’t be “feminaized” What’s left for your husband then? He can sit in front fo the tv while you work away/? Welcome home 1950!! I
Flag this comment
Unbelievable
Dec 23, 2008 9:57 AM CST
Scottie - All I can say to you is that I hope you don’t get divorced or your husband doesn’t get disabled or die with inadequate insurance leaving you to support your household. You are taking a big risk by putting your career on a back burner to his. But, it’s a free world and you are entitled to take whatever risks you choose. However, those of us who do not choose to take that risk (or are not able to depend financially on a man) need to work on getting men to get over their prejudices and sense of entitlement to lord over women at home and at work and your mindset and comments do nothing but perpetuate their prejudices in this regard.
Flag this comment
MB
Dec 23, 2008 10:01 AM CST
I suspect that a lot of the women who deride the article do not realize until it happens to them that though you can juggle, control, sacrifice and through will power, creativity and intellegence make it work, life is not static and things change. Women who don’t see what the problem is do a huge disservice to other women by being in denial that the conditions that work for them now may not always work in the same way. Illness, divorce, a handicapped or special needs child (or even just a particularly demanding child), a parent with dementia (all which tend to fall dispropportionately on the shoulders of women), a financial meltdown, or just exhaustion where there wasn’t exhuastion before, happen with regularity. The competitive conditions that were creative and pushed you to achieve can become unforgiving if the work-life balance gets disrupted for any significant period of time, depending on how old you are or what your other responsibilities are. When you have to keep juggling, sacrificing, adapting, and carrying responsibility for all the little and not so little inequities to hold you ground, any number of things can upset the balance. And any such things will likely happen to you eventually because we are mortal and that is how life works, and if the system doesn’t provide you with some sort of support in those situations these crisis are far more likely to bring you down than if we recognize the reality of the situation here and now. The lack of compassion from those who assume that “crisis”, of whatever form, won’t happen to them are simply perpetuating the problem. It also keeps everyone from looking at what the real problems and inequities are and determing what works when and how to incorporate that into the workplace in more than just an enecdotal way.
Flag this comment
elmo
Dec 23, 2008 10:10 AM CST
A lot of angry women (and men) weighing in on this. How about some perspective. If you work at biglaw you make more and have more -materially that is-than 99.99 percent of the people in the world. If you made that choice, be happy with it, but please don’t argue that it was necessary. I make 50K and my partner makes 20K. We’re comfortable and don’t complain about our lifestyle choices and not being able to afford a big house, trips or other luxuries. We have jobs that allow us time for a family.
If you enter the ultra competitive big law world- you can argue that things should be different- and maybe they should be-but wouldn’t it have been easier to just have made a different choice?
Flag this comment
not a women's issue
Dec 23, 2008 10:19 AM CST
I’m not sure the pressures facing women in Biglaw are any different than the pressures facing men—except that most of the men I work with have wives who stay home and raise the children. While they may appear to “have it all,” they don’t. They’re not there tending to the kids, seeing first steps, etc., which is what I want while I’m working. My husband would probably stay home if I asked him to because, economically, it makes more sense for me to work then for him. But I don’t ask him to because I’d rather keep my role as primary caregiver while trying to maintain my career. I look at the older men working at my firm and I can guarantee you that they weren’t there when their kids were little.
That said, the sooner we move this debate from a “women” issue to an “associate” or “lawyer” issue the better. I don’t see a lot of men my age or younger who want to make the same sacrifices that the partners above us did. As a result, we’ll continue to lose more associates for “work life” reasons. Maybe now that the men’s priorities are changing, the topic of having work/life balance will be less trivialized. The pyramid can’t support itself without the little worker bees at the bottom so something will have to give.
Flag this comment
B. McLeod
Dec 23, 2008 10:34 AM CST
Maybe the statistics showing women are disproportionately dropping out of Big Law are simply attributable to the women being smarter.
Flag this comment
Scottie
Dec 23, 2008 10:37 AM CST
Unbelievable—I will leave it at this. You are the one perpetuating prejudices. You are an equity partner at big law firm (your statement) probably making more money than 90% of the population. You are blessed with a child and a job. Yet, you complain and more or less say that “life is not fair” for women in the workplace. Then, to make the point you go emotional and disingenuously assert that you “hope I don’t get divorced” etc. and ratchet the rhetoric up about men lording prejudices over women. Shannon joins you and smacks me down with a June Cleaver insult—followed by the always effective exclamation marks!! Crabs in a bucket. If another successful working women appears to be happy, other women have to tell her why she shouldn’t be or make her out to be some sort of stepford wife. You complain, men disdain. Things will never change this way.
Flag this comment
Shannon
Dec 23, 2008 10:48 AM CST
Scottie, I don’t begrudge you your happy lifestyle. Good for you. What I do have a problem with is you suggesting that it’s fine for women to bear the burden of working in the work place and at home without ever uttering a complaint. It is high time for men to carry their fair share at home. It is women like you who set women back 50 years by declaring that it isn’t “manly” and therefore feminizing men if they should dare lift a pot or pan or, heaven forbid, change a diaper.
Flag this comment
Unbelievable
Dec 23, 2008 10:55 AM CST
Scottie, I’m glad you’re happy with your circumstance. You misread me if you think I’m unhappy with mine. I consider myself very fortunate I enjoy my work and my family. But, I continue to be dismayed that there are not more women who share my good fortune. Perhaps I’m naive and it’s true that women are choosing home & hearth over a satisfying career (the opt out interpretation). But, I continue to believe that they are being pushed out and that if women keep accepting the status quo instead of challenging it, I don’t see how things will ever change. I’m not being emotional when I say I hope you don’t get divorced, I’m being candid. There are lots of women out there without a man (or family trust) to support them who deserve and need to be compensated fairly for their work, and, as female lawyers, it is incumbent on us to challenge the status quo. If we don’t, who will???
Flag this comment
Scottie
Dec 23, 2008 11:00 AM CST
Shannon—Don’t be ridiculous. I suggested no such thing. My husband has changed more diapers in a day than my father changed his entire life. He cooks, too. I have even been known to complain. However, there is a gulf between the assertion that men should do their fair share at home and the assertion that the workplace must bend to the will of women—or we will complain mightily. Again, I agree there is inequality, but disagree with the approach submitted to deal with it. Look, I believe the differences between men and women are wonderful and necessary and as they should be—so what. This is no way means men should not do their fair share at home. But, that is a home issue, not a work issue.
Flag this comment
AGB
Dec 23, 2008 11:06 AM CST
We are not getting the point across to this new generaton of lawyers regarding how time intensive and all encompassing the practice of law has become. many of the technological innovations designed to make work more efficient have morphed into our new masters. The work-life balance we all seek has never been easily obtained and now is all but impossible. Kudos to MB for the inciteful and well reasoned explanation of the manner in which the law practice must intersect with the unfoldong of life events.
Flag this comment
Priorities Straight
Dec 23, 2008 11:07 AM CST
Scottie—Hear! Hear! Thank you for the fine example and cogent arguments. Way to stick up for the traditional (and thus woefully unpopular) viewpoint. So refreshing to read. We all make choices. The most contented and likeable people seem to be those who are happy with their choices. Good for you. And you are not alone. I, for one, (as well as many fellow associates) avoided avoided a big firm to work with likeminded people and spend more time with a spouse and young children. As a result, we are a happy, balanced group of people. Sure there is more money out there, but for my family and me, it was a healthy choice to strike a balance. So we don’t have cable TV, or a huge house. Big deal. What we is time, valuable time, and contentment. I would not even know how to complain about it.
Flag this comment
Shannon
Dec 23, 2008 11:15 AM CST
Scottie, here is a quotation from your previous post. In it you state that house husbands are bad and so is feminizing America. Feminist is not a bad word. Please explain what you mean by this if you think men should perform their fair share of the house work. Isn’t that a “house husband?”
I believe your last post entirely discredited what you stated below.
“Look, if you want to make the feminazi argument, then make it. In my opinion, women are trying to restructure homelife after the fact to accomodate workplace goals. Why do we want to turn men into a bunch of house husbands so that we can feel empowered? I suppose I have to admit that I believe the feminization of men in America is a bad thing.”
Flag this comment
Unbelieveable
Dec 23, 2008 11:17 AM CST
Scottie - one last shot at trying to get you to understand better where I’m coming from. On my way up the ranks I have experienced blatant discrimination and survived (so far). I both know of, and assume there are, others who have been less fortunate. I have to believe that you would see things differently if (i) you were unable to retain your job because of your gender and were forced to get a less satisfactory job (or unable to find one completely) or, (ii) if you found out that a guy you were training was getting paid more than you for doing lesser work. Maybe I’m wrong, but, if I’m not wrong, that’s very unfortunate because when women are willing to be doormats it allows these pernicious problems for women in the workplace to persist. That is all that I’m talking about - women need to stand up and demand equal treatment. Not day in day out, but, at the appropriate moments such as compensation and promotion time. I’m glad to hear you hold your husband accountable at home and agree that’s a home issue and not a work issue. However, at work, personally, I do encourage my male peers to help out at home and work reduced schedules to help truly make this a cross-gender issue. I also encourage junior women to negotiate a fair balance at home rather than just accept the status quo. As a final note, perhaps it’s just a coincidence, but, of the folks I know who’ve been laid off in the recent weeks and months, a high majority of them have been women.
Flag this comment
The Sky Is Not Falling
Dec 23, 2008 11:33 AM CST
I am a new law school grad 3 months into a BigLaw job. I have a preschooler and my husband quit his job to stay home full-time when I took the bar. I have noted in the year or so that I have been reading articles in the ABA Journal that I have yet to see one positive article about female lawyers in the workplace, and find it impossible to believe that this is a coincidence. Becoming a lawyer was my second career and I can assure you that conditions at most U.S. law firms are significantly better for women now than they were 15 years ago. While I am happy to consider both sides of any issue, I am tired of reading articles about how hopeless my situation is in the eyes of the legal media. I for one love my job, and there are happy female attorneys with families in addition to those who may be burned out or ready for a change. Please stop reporting exclusively on one side of the work-life balance debate when it comes to women. I have only been an attorney (officially) for one month, and it is already beyond old.
Flag this comment
Kenneth Lynch
Dec 23, 2008 11:55 AM CST
“...and the assumption that top-performing women are motivated most by money and power….”
uhhh, aren’t most top performers in the profession motivated by money and power regardless of gender, or is it to be suggested that us guys have some innate ‘altruism gene’? Sounds good, I’ll buy it!
Flag this comment
jose
Dec 23, 2008 12:06 PM CST
Either work 2,250 hours a year and enjoy the profession or shut up and go do your own thing.
There is no room for slackers who do not work long hours every day all their careeer.
Flag this comment
lifeofideas
Dec 23, 2008 12:15 PM CST
It looks like about 15 of the posts are ad hominem attacks. This is not good. The system has become the enemy, and the system needs to be changed. If you get suckered into “you just aren’t trying hard enough” arguments, you will probably later regret it. If you get twice the salary for twice the hours (of a normal person) then you aren’t really getting paid that much.
Flag this comment
Scottie
Dec 23, 2008 12:18 PM CST
Shannon-1) I did not say that house husbands are bad; 2) Feminizing America has nothing to do with feminism per se; and 3) I did not say that feminism is bad. I believe I used the term “feminazi” which is different. In fact, I am a feminist. Being a feminist, however, does not mean ignoring the many differences between men and women and it certainly does not contemplate all of this whining women do when others do not fully appreciate their situation. I know I will catch a lot of heat for that, but we are whiners. I have not taken feminism the extra step that was nevered intended by the originators of the feminist movement and demand that others (usually men) change their lifestyles, standards and especially their feelings so that I can fulfill my own personal and professional goals—i.e. “have it all”. To my previous quote you point out—I wondered why some women want to turn men into house husbands to feel empowered. In other words, why do some women feel that they are being marginalized because men do not stay home full time with the children and run the household (converse of house wife) so that the wife can FULLY pursue a career for the sake of proving she can do it. Or, even more bold, why do some women feel marginalized when their male co-workers have a spouse and three kids but do not have the same responsibilities at home that they do. It is absurd. It’s none of our business. The way they run their personal lives is their business. If it frees them up for work—so be it. I’ll say it again, women will get respect over time by performing well and complaining about inequality less. We make choices. Our choices have consequences. Women need to be reasonable and accountable. It is the ONLY way men will see us as the equals that we know we are.
Flag this comment
Zaftig
Dec 23, 2008 12:23 PM CST
Oh, where is Ellen Barshevsky when we need her?!?!?
Flag this comment
BigLaw Senior Associate
Dec 23, 2008 12:56 PM CST
I am a senior associate at a BigLaw firm (my second as a result of a geographical move on my part). I will be up for partner next year. I have a 2-year old and an infant at home. While I agree that the demands of working at a law firm are great, I find it manageable to continue working full-time and spend time with my family by being more efficient at work (limited chit-chatting with my neighbors and eating lunch at my desk while I work), doing work at home after the kids go to bed, and getting GREAT support from my husband (who is also an attorney). That said, my firm and particularly the other attorneys I work with are generally very supportive of my demands as a mother and wife in the sense that there is no penalty for being out of the office for a few hours so that you can take your child to the doctor (other firms may not have this attitude). This is the case because I make sure that I am responsive and I get things done when I say that I will (true emergencies are the obvious exception). I don’t begrudge those women who choose to take a different route because they want to have guaranteed time with their family on a regular basis. There have been plenty of times where I have worked past my children’s bedtimes and didn’t get to see them that night. My point is that, if you want it, you can still succeed at a large law firm provided you have support from your spouse. The issues that I have involve the actual having of the children and maternity leave. My advancement toward partnership was delayed a year, which is something my male peers who had children in the same time frame don’t have to worry about. However, I also recognize that it was my choice to take extra time off to be with my children (6 months and 5 months) during that period and that other associates who didn’t take that time off may have gained more experience during that year. Also, I feel like I should wait to have another child (if I am so inclined) until after I make partner because I feel like I would be pushed back more if I have a child in the year I am up for partner. I don’t know how we get around those issues because it is basic biology that I am the one (as opposed to my husband) who has to have the baby. Granted, I don’t have to take the extra maternity leave beyond that necessary for my own physical recovery, but even if I just took that short medical leave in the year I was up for partner, I think it would have a negative effect.
Flag this comment
Unbelievable
Dec 23, 2008 1:09 PM CST
BigLaw Senior Associate - Thanks for sharing your story and thanks to your husband for supporting you as well. You are the future. I hope you are able to keep up the juggling act to be another crucial role model for those who follow. For whatever reason, there have not been enough women sticking it out. To end discrimination there must be a critical mass of women at the equity partner level and in decision making roles on committees.
Flag this comment
Scrooge
Dec 23, 2008 2:43 PM CST
Its not just the women subject to the white-male establishment..its also the minorities. The whole law firm “diversity” is a joke, all talk and token substance. At least white-females have it easier over minority-females (a double whammy).
Flag this comment
Annie Oak
Dec 23, 2008 2:57 PM CST
The women who drop out of law practice to have kids make promotions more difficult not just for them, but for all OTHER women. It’s hard to convince an employer that a woman really will work as hard as a man, when other women around us keep whining about needing “work-life balance.”
Flag this comment
B. McLeod
Dec 23, 2008 3:29 PM CST
I differ with the argument that women have to do x, y or z, “not just for them, but for all other women.” Same point with the notion that anybody who happens to be in a minority group should have such an obligation. People are entitled to live their own lives.
Flag this comment
First YearAssociate at BigLaw
Dec 23, 2008 3:49 PM CST
I believe the equity partner who wrote earlier hit the nail on the head. Strip away all the noise, and the bottom line problem is that women at law firms do not have access to same breadth of potential mentors that men do. Not only are male partners (consciously or subconsciously) not willing or able to provide the support, in addition, among females, while there are some eager mentors, there are also many female partners who having faced gender related challenges themselves do not see the need to alleviate those challenges for young female attorneys rising up the ranks. The struggle and subsequent success is a measure of their accomplishment and to help young female attorneys would amount to making it “easy” for them.
Flag this comment
Add a Comment
We welcome your comments, but please adhere to our comment policy.
Commenting has expired on this post.