Lucky Ducks Who Avoided Layoffs—So Far—Should Lay Low, Snark Advises

For BigLaw associates cringing every time they pass a partner in the firm's hallways and staggering under the weight of the "work" they carry home at night to appear busy, an anonymous but famed fellow-traveler has some advice.

Lay low and don't lose your sense of humor, suggests the Snark in a humor column published by the Daily Report and reprinted by New York Lawyer (reg. req.). Although the blistering pace of major firm layoffs appears to have slowed a bit in recent days, it's not the right time to start wearing your "I Survived the Purge" T-shirt just yet.

"Work is slow, and no one can get anything done because they are obsessing over the potential loss of employment," the Snark writes. But don't make this too obvious. Since luck often determines who sinks or swims in BigLaw practice, chances are you'll continue to collect a BigLaw paycheck—or not—based on factors that may be beyond your control.

And, for those with a satirical bent, the Snark suggests a new approach to the layoffs game: Much in the manner of a television reality show, associates should be selected for—or spared—the ax based on their ability to survive in an intensive document-review deprivation situation. Popular and physically attractive associates would get points in the game, as they do in actual practice, by allowing fellow contestants a vote on who stays and who goes.

Read the full column.