‘You’re Outplaced.’ What’s the Best Euphemism You’ve Ever Heard?

It's one thing to be told directly, "You're fired." But does it really soften the blow to hear "you're outplaced" or "you're being retired?"

These are just a couple of the terminal euphemisms we've seen recently on ABAJournal.com. The Financial Times points out an array of semantic sidesteps that companies take when delivering the bad news: "dynamic rightsizing" (dotcom crash); or "Credit Suisse accelerates implementation of strategic plan" (layoff of 5,300 employees).

While these euphemisms do very little to ease the pain for the affected workers, the FT notes that a softer message makes life easier for those doing the firing.

This made us wonder what creative re-phrasings you've heard or come up with to soften the blow that harsher words might inflict.

So tell us ...

What's the best euphemism you've ever heard? Please share the phrasing and the context in the comments section below.

Read the question and answers from last week's question about most unusual document service anecdote.

Our favorite answer from last week:

Posted by Renn: "I represented a gentleman in an uncontested divorce case. He was served by his wife in one of the nastiest ways… She had called up one of those telegram service companies that do the singing telegrams, hired a 'Santa,' and provided the Santa with a wrapped gift to hand over after he was finished singing 'We wish you a Merry Christmas.' My client opened the package and discovered the divorce papers. Some happy holidays."