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Which swimming-with-sharks caption is the best fit?

This poll ended on Sun, July 20, 2014 - 11:59:10.

Results

  • "What do you mean 'professional courtesy'? He was just an associate."
    166 votes (44.5%)
  • "Now that's what I call a 'pro-bait' lawyer! Delicious!"
    125 votes (33.51%)
  • "Bottom feeding is not what it used to be!"
    82 votes (21.98%)
Total Votes: 373

Do you think court proceedings should be broadcast?

This poll ended on Mon, July 28, 2014 - 12:10:48.

Results

  • Yes, the public has a right to see all proceedings.
    512 votes (35.29%)
  • No, cameras don't belong in the courtroom.
    507 votes (34.94%)
  • Only if all parties consent to the filming.
    311 votes (21.43%)
  • Only criminal court proceedings.
    121 votes (8.34%)
Total Votes: 1451

Which spoon-on-the-witness-stand caption fits best?

This poll ended on Sun, June 22, 2014 - 11:59:05.

Results

  • "Mr. Spoon, let's clarify for the Court, it is your testimony under oath, that before the accident, you did not see this fork in the road?"
    420 votes (30.09%)
  • Ironically, his testimony cut like a knife.
    362 votes (25.93%)
  • "You left my client for quite a little dish, didn't you?"
    221 votes (15.83%)
  • "Are you asking this court to believe that you've never been seen with my client?"
    214 votes (15.33%)
  • "Paternity tests show you're the father of the spork."
    179 votes (12.82%)
Total Votes: 1396
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