Obiter Dicta

K-9 Complication

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Fire Island National Seashore, an hour east of New York City, is a place where you can go and let it all hang out figuratively and literally.

And it’s for that reason that Mark DelCore, a 39-year-old former bodybuilder, makes regular visits to the beach. He claims to be afflicted with a chronic skin condition triggered by the particulate matter in the air in the aftermath of the 9/11 terror attacks. DelCore claims also that the only way to get relief is to expose every square inch of his body to the sunlight. And, he says, the clothing optional beach area there is the only place he can go to bask in the buff.

But DelCore insists on bringing his rat terrier, Cheekies, along for company, even though park policy allows only service animals.

In a lawsuit filed in July, DelCore maintains that Cheekies is a service animal because he “provides me emo­­tional support and comfort.” Del­Core is suing Fire Island National Sea­shore and two of its employees, one of whom he calls “crass” and “impatient.” He seeks to have the park open to all leashed pets, and to have one of the park employees subjected to mandatory sensitivity training.

Shortly after the suit was filed, the defendants submitted a brief denying the legality of the clothing-optional beach, questioning the validity of DelCore’s skin condition and disputing the notion that his dog could be categorized as a service animal. (Perhaps DelCore has never heard of a sunlamp.)

Booty Call

Female Faces Fine for Detailing Desire to Have Dreamy Deputy Dispatched

As Washington County Sheriff’s Deputy Frank Hudson spoke to Lorna Dudash about the loud music at her home, he seemed to have her rapt attention. But she apparently had something else on her mind.

Minutes af­ter the dashing deputy left the premises, the Aloha, Ore., woman decided she would like an encore visit because of his, well, arresting appearance.

Police say Dudash, apparently unaware of the nonemergency police number, proceeded to use the town’s 911 line as a dial-a-date service.

An incredulous dispatcher, asking Dudash the reason for her call, reportedly got this response: “He’s the cutest cop I’ve seen in a long time. I just want to know his name.” Dudash continued her quest to connect with the comely cop. “Hon­ey, I’m just going to be honest with you, OK?” she reportedly said. “I just thought he was cute. I’m 45 years old and I’d just like to meet him again.”

Soon thereafter she got her wish, and a date with a judge. Hudson returned, verified there was no emer­gency and charged her with misusing the 911 system. The offense is punishable by up to a year in jail and a possible fine of thousands of dollars. Sheriff’s department spokesman David Thompson says if Dudash had dialed the nonemergency number, “the deputy would have been passed a message. It would have generated a call.”

Then, Dudash might have gotten her man.

Written by Brian Sullivan; Stories by the Columbia and; Research by Wendell LaGrand.

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